To be a Pansy

Why is it that we call a whiney, whimpy, ready-to-give-up person, a pansy? Not knowing too much about plants, much less how to grow them, I observe that my strongest, long lasting plant is my pansy. Mollia had given her to me two weeks after we came to New Stu. The little flower sits solo in her pot, on my bedroom window sill. Turning her head towards the sky even when the sun doesn't visit.
Mollia is my neighbor two apartments down from us. And even though her dog poops in our backyard, I really like her. She teaches English at the school (which, she says, none of the students care to learn about.) She's quiet, even in her expressions, making it hard to get to know her. But she holds the keys of the green house and the wisdom of growing plants indoors. She let me take the keys a couple of times to look around, and offered beds for my own plants. But I had no idea where to start. What grows well in a Alaskan greenhouse over the winter?!! I was lost in that building that stuck out beautifully next to teacher housing. And although my kids were entertained by running between the rows and picking the too ripe tomatoes off of Mollia's plants- I sat there staring at dirt, bored and ignorant.

Ruby in front of our green house, on a rainy walk

Then a Saturday came where I had three hours to spend with Mollia and her family in the greenhouse. She gave Wolfe the job of flooding the beds while she and I transferred her summer plants, tomatoes, strawberries, chives, marigolds, into pots so they could spend their last days inside our apartments. (I italicize "pots" because we used empty milk jugs, apple juice containers or anything plastic we saved for this. Pots are not sold here at the small, local grocery store.)  In that time with Mollia, we shared sibling stories, opinions on parenting, and laughs about habits we had. Wolfe had the funnest time, and I had adopted strawberry, marigold and tomato plants to house with my small pansy flower.

Cans of rocks behind Ruby hold the windows shut

Wolfe- flooding the beds and getting dirty!

Wolfe's job is to water...

Ruby's job is to look for rocks, and not pull little green plants!

Sometimes we just go to make mud soup

Happy little gardener

Mollia surprised me; she was quiet, but smart, sweet and fun. She offers what she knows about growing indoors, and encourages me to work more in the greenhouse. This week i received my own set of keys to do the watering/weeding while she is teaching. We already have spinach, lettuce, carrots, radishes, cabbage and onions planted for the winter's harvest. I find it a blessing to learn about green-housing with good company. The warmer air (it's a toasty 50 degrees in the greenhouse!) and the smell of dirt puts me in a good mood. Wolfe's muddy fingernails tells me he is learning too. And the way Ruby looks for rocks in the beds makes me proud. Let's see what this winter will bring. I may not be successful at the spinach, but I do see blessings in other areas.

The littlest plant- with the greenhouse and school in view

So to be honest, part of me doesn't want to see ALL the things winter will bring. Now with darker days and colder weather, my attitude is winey, whimpy and ready to give up Alaska. (My eyes are not turned upon Jesus. I try to sing that song when I'm grumpy, but it doesn't always work.)
Yet, even at night, my little flower still reminds me to pray to be a pansy. Little and learning, strong and hopeful. And, as though hard as it may be, not giving up in cold weather. 




(All my green-thumb aunts reading this blog better not tell me this isn't a pansy...)

Some mornings, winter is already here!